Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Fuck Listed

This started a year ago. To be technical it really started 10 years ago. While I was going though the 8 weeks of training for my current job there was often down time between activities. Because I like lists I decided to make a list of everyone I've had sex with. The definition of sex has a big impact on the length of the list. I used the the most all-encompasing definition I know of. It was created when I was in college and therefore I call it the UMass definition of sex: Any act involving two or more people where the result or goal is sexual pleasure or orgasm.

Memory is a major factor in making a sex list. Especially because I am horrible with names. Therefore many of the men on my list have clever descriptions to jog my memory such as "Milford Southern Hotel Guy" or "West Hartford 3some." In my defense I knew (most of) their names at the time...I just can't remember them now. I may not know their name but I always remember the act. Granted it took me several days to remember some of the more obsure ones. I'd be driving home and have a sudden brain storm "Wait, what about that guy in at UMass with the JLo poster on his wall?" Writing this post has jump started my memory and there were several additions added in the last couple days. Ok enough with the rambling. Lets get down to the numbers:
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The current total is 163.


I've played with 15% of my friends list on Facebook.


I lost my virginity at the age of 19 in Providence RI. His name was/is Pete.


I've had sex in 3 countries. As well as on a cruise ship. I'm not sure what that counts as. International Waters?


I've had sex in 8 out of the 50 States (+ DC)


I've had 163 sexual partners and 2 boyfriends.


About 95% of the men are/were older then me.


With that out of the way, lets look behind the numbers. As a side not, heavy making out with over the cloths groping does not count on this list.

As a reader you'd expect this to be followed by stories from the best and the worst. I can't think of one specific time that was The Best. However there is a clear stand outs for best kisser. I won't name names because I think he reads this blog and I wouldn't want to embarrass him. But all I can say is that he had the softest juicy lips I've ever felt. Truly amazing. Best 3some is a tie. Each time a rare feat was accomplished, I was able to cum without any touching or contact with my dick. The first time it happened I was getting fucked and it felt like I was going to piss myself. I was pleasantly surprised to say the least.

This post took me about 3 days to finish. My main hesitation was revealing the total number. I started the post because I thought you would find it funny that I actually took time and hand wrote a list of everyone I've had sex with. I wasn't worried about how people would react because most of my close friends shouldn't be surprised with anything I've said. I was concerned that this was passing the point of class and good taste. I've always tried to live my life with a little dignity and class. I decided that there is dignity in being totally honest and starting a coversation. Here's to the next 163!


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4 comments:

  1. Good for you..nothing to be ashamed about... now right a book.....it could be a best seller!

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  2. I don't agree with your definition of sex.... if its all about the Intent or goal then I'm in trouble!!! And then you should also include the peeps with clothes on as I'm sure some of them there was a goal was sexual pleasure!!!

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  3. im double that number....and proud of it...

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  4. whose the best kisser, I'm sure he wouldn't be embarassed if you named names

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