Drag Race FOREVER!

Here is your mid season TV update:

*Project Runway is back and it's the perfect show to take a nap to. Following the underwhelming second season of All Starts, the new PR is back and this time the contestants are on teams. Project Runway has gotten tired and the contestants are more forgettable the ever. If that wasn't bad enough, Michael Kors left the show and was replaced by Zac Posen. Zac is ok, but so far he isn't serving up bitchy judge realness.

*The series finale of 30 Rock is this Thursday. As much as I'm sad to see it go, I also think it's time. Let's be honest. This season and last were not the show's best. Do you remember the Leap Day episode? Gag. Better to go off the air while you still have some dignity.

*Season 5 of Rupaul's Drag Race started last night. I adore Drag Race. It's wonderful reality competition at it's best. Nicki and Mariah have nothing on these bitches. If you've never seen the show, you've obviously made poor life decisions. Maybe you're too busy monitoring Julie Chen's Twitter account. Either way it's time to jump on board with 14 new queens. I won't go through each one, but I'll give you the highlights:

Alaska: is Sharon Needles' boyfriend. She's a dumbed down version of Ms. Needles but there's potential there.

Serena Chacha is a total mess. A MESS! Not in a funny "We want to watch and see what happens" kind of way, but in a "You look like a boy in a dress kind of way"

Alyssa Edwards is the queen with a chip on her shoulder and something to prove.

Roxxy Andrews is a thicker gurl who's on top of her game.

Detox is and early stand out. Fierce.

Go to logotv.com for more information and to watch full episodes. Also be sure to check out behind the scenes action on Untucked. It may be better then the regular show.

Shirtless Movie Review

Shirtless movie review of This is 40 and Movie 43

Random Thoughts

I have a beard now. 

When doing your regular grooming, don't neglect your belly button. It needs just as much maintenance as the rest of your body.

Speaking of bellies, as you already know I am a belly lover. One of the hottest parts of a man's body is the under curve of his belly. He might be posing with bulging muscles but it's his belly that gives you a boner.

The McDonald's McFlurry may just be the best desert in the world. 

I love drunken make-out sessions. Kissing and groping while everyone else watches...They're a huge turn on and yet completely harmless. The best of both worlds. 

The Zac Efron Effect- When it comes to men, my boyfriend's taste tends toward the classic bear/bubba physique. However, he'd be the first to admit he totally wants to have sex with Zac Efron. It may sound strange but I bet you've strayed from your type at one point too. We've all found someone at one point or another who is totally fuckable despite being the opposite of our type. If you like skinny he may be fat, if you like short he may be tall. It may not be common but it happens. Who's your Zac Efron? I won't name mine cause he's a local who reads this blog. Gasp!

I finally caught up to 2011 and bought the second season of Shameless on DVD. I still jerk off every time Ian fucks Mickey. When they're in the dug out... Fuck that was hot! If you get Showtime, season 3 just premiered a couple weeks ago. I'll get it on DVD in 2014.

Today (January 24) is my boyfriends birthday. Happy Birthday to the best guy in the world. You make me laugh and smile with your enormous charm. There's no one I'd rather be with.

I apologize about the picture and my shinny face/head. #ShinnyFaceRealness

TBRU (Texas Bear Round Up) Is less then two months away and I'm so excited to see my Connecticut crew as well as past TBRU buddies. We're gonna party HARD!

Joe's Spank Me Time

Are you a 'Mariah Carey' in bed?

Try and picture Mariah Carey in having sex. The image that instantly comes to mind is of Ms. Carey laying on a bed with perfect makeup, hair, and lighting while some eager young stud furiously works hard to give her pleasure. Her only sexual talent is simply allowing him the privilege to service her. She's a sex diva. By the way... no matter how well he licks her pussy he still must only address her as Ms. Carey before during and after coitus.

This is a question of service. Do you like it when guys simply want to be serviced without any reciprocation? It's a question that can really divide a room. For some people, it's their ultimate goal. They just want to be kneeling in a corner as a rough stud fucks their face. These are the men who created glory holes 15 years ago and now keep the Craigslist M4M section alive. Also included in this group are the men that just love sucking dick more then anything else. It's less of a dominance situation and more a true love for the sport. On the opposite side of this argument are the men that require a partner to give as well as receive. An eye for an eye or cock for a cock arrangement. These men view sex in a much more egalitarian fashion.

Side Note: I can't help but also notice some of the divide comes down to cum. If you're a guy who loves to swallow come (cum sluts/cum pigs etc) you're much more likely to want a pure service situation. If your feeling toward cum are less devout, most likely you want him to give as much as he receives.

A friend offered his prospective. He said he didn't mind servicing a 'Mariah Carey' if it was a one time trick. (ie the Blow & Go) However in the case of a regular fuck buddy, he admitted the routine got boring. That's understandable. There's something very hot about a guy using your body for his pleasure but that appeal can wear off very quickly if your needs are never met. I had a fuck buddy back home who loved getting serviced and nothing gave me more pleasure then wrapping my lips around his hot cock. I'd suck, he'd cum, and we were done and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. A true MC. (The memories still gets me hard) On the flip side, I've also had regular FBs who like giving please as much as they like getting it. One guy comes to mind and the time we were swapping rim jobs at a bar. Now that's a true #TrashyFriday! For me, I guess it comes down to my mood for the moment. Different guys fill the need for different moments in life. Also the one unifying factor throughout is usually confidence. Whether it's a quiet comfort level or a strong cocky attitude, I like guys who aren't shy and nervous. Maybe that's the real lesson. If your cute and confident I'm much more likely to go along for the ride.

For the record, I am a huge fan of the real Mariah Carey. #TEAMMARIAH

Playlist

Before I get into my current music selections, I must address a very important item. This week Justin Timberlake released his first new song in 6 years. The song titled Suit and Tie may just be one of the worst songs I've ever heard. I mean we're talking total horse shit. It makes Rihanna's Diamonds sound like the voice of an angel. I'm afraid Justin may be loosing his magic when it comes to music. Maybe he should stick to SNL guest appearances instead.

Now let's get to music that's actually worth listening too,

My current music obsession is Sweet Nothing by Calvin Harris ft Florence Welch.

Other song on my playlist:

Don't You Worry Child by Swedish House Mafia
Beauty and the Beat by Justin Bieber ft Nicki Minaj
Scream and Shout by Will.i.am ft Britney Spears
Never Leave You by Lumidee (an oldie but goodie)

Golden Globes Wrap Up

The Golden Globes aired last night celebrating their 70th Anniversary. The evening was hosted by the amazing Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. They killed it! As a friend said on Facebook, "They should host everything, always." They walked the fine line of being fun, friendly, and edgy. Absolute perfection! I could watch them all day long. Perfect Perfect Perfect.

Major winners include Anne Hathaway, Ben Affleck, Hugh Jackman, Daniel Day Lewis, Les Mis, and Argo. Adele was pretty post pregnancy, while Girls star Lena Dunham couldn't walk in her shoes. President Clinton even made an appearance to present Lincoln for Best Drama.

Jodi Foster was the major non-award story of the evening. Foster was given the lifetime achievement award and she gave weird speech about not coming out. Before she got even got on stage there was her bizarreness of  table mate Mel Gibson. Really? He's your big celebrity friend? That's embarrassing. Then she got on stage and the bizarreness continued. The whole speech was a bit odd and I did't think it was as great as everyone else. I kept thinking she should have practiced it before hand. She started out oddly by quoting Sally O'Mally from SNL "I'm 50! I'm 50!". Jodi is not someone known for comedy. She eventually got on track and talked about her personal life and coming out at an early age. She didn't want to officially say she's gay because that's too personal. While I respect her choice, it also makes my eyes role. My major problem is that I HATE it when a celebrity comes out in the twilight of their career. I've always been underwhelmed by Rosie O'Donnell for the same reason. I respect stars who actually say their gay when its a risk and they have something to loose. Ellen, Jim Parsons and Anderson Cooper are good examples. They chose to come out with shows still on the air. Ellen broke ground on her hit prime time sitcom. Cooper and Parson's outing was a lot less of a risk, but at least they did it while they were still relevant. Jodi Foster is the farthest thing from relevant and now we know she's gay. (even though she won't actually say it) She took the easy way out. Good back home Jodi, you're a pussy. Side note: When then played the video retrospective of Foster's career, did anyone else realize she hasn't been in as many hit movies as we thought?

The fashion of the evening featured a lot of boring and messy gowns. Very few stand outs and most actresses just looked fine. The Best Actress winners both had boob problems. Best Actress in a drama winner Jessica Chastain had horrible droopy boobs in blue Calvin Klein and Best Actress in a comedy Jennifer Lawrence had pointy boobs in red Dior. The real winner of the night was (my all time favorite designer) Alexander McQueen. The two best dresses of the night were both from the British fashion house. Kate Hudson and Nicole Kidman both looked perfect in their gold and black dresses.

Oscar Nominations

More Money More Problems?

Is it ever a good idea to except a new job ONLY because it pays more?

Today my boss pulled my aside to tell me about a possible job opening in another department that she thought I would be good for. The job description wasn't that exciting until she said it would be an increase in salary. (specific numbers weren't discussed) Before I get into the money aspect, I should give you some background. I started working for my current employer (an insurance company) as an escape out of retail. It was a steady position with a stable company and it meant I wouldn't have to work weekends ever again. All very practical reasons but nothing to do with a love of the field or a long term career goal. The company was also big enough that it allowed me to move across the country and stay employed. My current position is designed to be a place where people get their feet wet before moving up into more advanced careers. Therefore there is a constant push to promote people from within. That's wonderful except that I am totally uninterested in most of those advanced positions that they want to promote me to. Most of these position are ones that primarily deal customers. Basically I would  be spending my day returning phone calls. One of the things I love most about my job now is that it has little to no customer contact. The only calls I make are usually to hospitals to track down a missing medical bills. My job is comfortable and low stress. I have no doubt in my abilities and I’m sure if promoted I could preform well in the position. But is more stress and aggravation worth it just for a couple more bucks on payday?

All of this swirls in my head whenever a promotion is mentioned. If I were to keep it simple and ask myself “Do I want this promotion?” The answer would probably be no. My instinct is to play it safe and stick with what the familiar and safe route. Although it’s that way of thinking that will keep me poor for years to come. I’d consider my salary to be in the low to average category.  Yes, I'll admit I live above my means and there is always room to make cutbacks. For example, I love my apt, but I'll probably have to move when my lease is up because I sense a major increase coming now that new owners have taken over. As much as I love the independence, living alone doesn’t help my budget either. A higher paying job would help pay off bills much quicker and hopefully give my savings account a much needed breath of air.

My current Visa bill is it's own motivation but I also need to start thinking about long term goals and realities. I don’t want to be 45 and still living paycheck to paycheck with $60 in my savings account. Winning the lottery is never a good retirement plan. My goal is to someday buy a condo and having enough money for a respectable down payment is a daunting task. All I can picture is Suze Orman in my head wagging her disapproving finger. Is being a grown up defined as making choices you don't want to make? Doing things you don't want to do? Doesn't low stress and comfortable count for anything?

Joe's Spank Me Time

Welcome to Streamzoo

Streamzoo is a new photo sharing app that's giving Instagram a run for it's money. The basic layout of Streamzoo is similar to Instagram but with add features that can make the app feel a little clunky. It feels like the Windows version of an Apple product. Apple is known for their streamlined products that are very simple and easy to use. Windows products on the other hand can get bogged down with menus, features and option. Streamzoo has a feature where users earn Badges based on their activity. For example, when you first sign up you get the "Newbie" badge. You can also earn point but my interest level in the points in so low that I don't know how you get them or what you do with them once their yours. Points and badges are lame. I am not a 45 year old woman and this is not Pinterest. Streamzoo does have some positives going for it like the ability to post videos. That's an awesome feature that is lacking in many other apps. In addition you can send private messages to other users. So is it worth the switch? Here are some of the most popular (and misguided) reasons for signing up.

One of the main reasons people, or at least the people I know, are flocking to SZ is because they allow X-rated photos and video. I'm all for sex pics, but that job is currently being held by Tumblr and Tumblr is doing splendidly. I can see the need for a photo sharing site that lets you be free with your cock and ass though. (Shout out to Atxbears who posted some great j/o videos today. Well done sir.) Sexuality can be an easy crutch that eventually kills creativity. Naked pictures are easy and after a while they can start to look generic. Think of how many boring jerk off videos are on Xtube right now or faceless anus shots on Tumblr? (Don't get me wrong, I love a good pic of a beefy man's hole) One of the reasons I like that Instagram is because it doesn't allow X rated content. It forces users to be a bit more creative with their sexuality.

The second reason I see people jumping on Streamzoo's ship is because it's not Instagram. Like any very popular brand, there are always going to be punks that hate it just because it's popular. For every McDonald's, Coca Cola and Facebook there is a Burger King, Pepsi, and Google+.  That coupled with Instagram's User Agreement nightmare, gave many excuse to look for something new. I'm also starting to notice a lot more people on SZ have private profiles. I'm curious if they learned their lesson from sharing to much on Instagram. Does your boss need to see your home grown pot plants? Probably not. I've long advocated for using every privacy setting available to you and now it seems like people are starting to agree. It's much easier to start out private then to change midstream and have to delete people.

On a final note about the sexually explicit content, users should be warned that Streamzoo is not the all welcoming 'wave your freak flag' app it might appear to be. Streamzoo's guidelines are very clear:

I suspect it's a policy that doesn't get enforced because the app is still relatively new and under the radar. However if popularity continues to grow, I suspect they will start cracking down on horny users.

Overall I like Streamzoo more then I first expected but I am still skeptical is it can continue to hold my interest. Truthfully, I predict it will go the way of Google+ and Cyndi Lauper. But time will tell and I could always be proven wrong. What do you think? Have you signed up yet?

Like Instagram, my Streamzoo user name is TheGayGasp if you want to follow me. Or better yet, just send me a faceless asshole shot.