Monday, October 28, 2013

Banksy

Banksy is a graffiti artist who you may or may not have heard of despite his headline grabbing work in New York City recently. Like me, you may have heard the name but without much context or further information. I first heard of the artist while reading a funny article on Buzzfeed about an adorable dog who was caught peeing on a small street side work. Soon after a friend living in New York snapped a picture of the Sirens of the Lambs truck driving bye. The name caught my eye again and I filed the information in the back of my head for later research. Not surprisingly just as quickly as I saw the image I  forgot it. That was until Yahoo ran an article about an op-ed piece he had written that was rejected by the New York Times. That's when I decided to find out what this Banksy chatter was all about. After some simple Googling, I found out that he is a British artist currently taking up residency in the Big Apple although his work can be found in several world cities. Although mainly know for street art, he is also a director, political activist and painter.

I must admit my first impression was of the Banky was quite negative. The Yahoo article discussed his failed op-ed piece about the new tower being built on the 9/11 site. He bashed the tower because he felt it was a boring architectural compromise. The whole story reeked of a cry for publicity and attention. I got the feeling that he was more stunt man than artist and I was ready to roll my eyes. However, after looking through the images of his signature stencil work I realized I was completely wrong. There was a delicate subversive humor and wit to his pieces that I didn't expect. Rather than cover a random wall with generic tags, his work was clever and often is influenced by the surrounding. For example, a stone arch is transformed into a bridge for two Japanese geisha girls. I was surprised at how much I enjoyed what I saw. Rarely has my opinion taken such a turn. I look forward to seeing more of his past and future works and hopefully I've peeked your interest enough to give him a look as well. 













All images are from New York City and can be found on http://www.banksy.co.uk/

Thursday, October 24, 2013

8 Random Observations

1. Kim K and Kanye are engaged. How does the man who hates fame and publicity marry the biggest media leach in history? Regardless, I can't wait for Kanye's line to come out at Sears.


2. Bitstrips are the newest craze to take over Facebook. FYI they're not cute or funny and just generally awful. AWFUL! You should be embarrassed every time you post one.


3. Instead, I'd prefer to see Unimpressed Dog become the next big meme. Here is the blank picture. Meme away.

4. Pope Francis, the 266th head of the Catholic church is making waves with his approachable and casual nature. It seems the church finally has a leader who wants to focus on inclusion and love rather than sin and judgement. He hasn't completely overhauled the rules but is instead chosen the path of kindness.

5. While we're on the subject of Popes... I'd love to know the true story behind Pope Benedict's decision to step down. There's got to be some serious drama and secrecy there. I'm talking Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes divorce level drama and secrecy.

6. If you didn't think miracles were possible... this is Victoria Beckham before she was famous. Seriously.

7. I've noticed people jumping on the "I'm skipping TBRU this year" bandwagon purely because they think that's what everyone else is doing. I've got a better idea, instead of TBRU, why don't we all jump off a bridge instead!

8. When you go to a concert, do you spend more time watching the actual show or watching the show through your phone as you take video? We're all guilty of it. Here's a tip to being a good audience member: Put your phone away and enjoy in the moment. Sometimes a memory is better than a recorded image.

video




Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Post It Notes


video

This cute and harmless video has caused me a lot of frustration. It was taken one morning as I was getting back into bed after going to move me car. The video isn't really sexual at all except for the fact that I'm momentarily naked. That quick shot of my twig and plums makes the video un-postable to any sharing app like Instagram, Streamzoo, and Tumblr. Yes you read that correctly I said Tumblr. The site that features cum facials, fucking, rimming and piss drinking felt my little video was unacceptable. I tried posting it twice and it was quickly removed for violating the sites content restrictions. Seriously? Seriously!

I stopped trying to post it because I've already been kicked off Instagram and Streamzoo once so I don't want to push my luck. Apple's far reaching no nudity policy is starting to be enforced more then ever. YouTube.com will let you post privately but that's not fool proof either. Recently a friend of mine had all if his (private) hot cocksucking videos removed after lasting over a year. Tumblr I can't figure out. Someone told me that Tumblr doesn't like any videos posted directly to it's site because of bandwidth limits. Instead videos have to be posted elsewhere and then shared on Tumblr. But where? I guess we're only left to the clunky old faithful Xtube. If they were smart they'd improve their moble site and reclaim their dominance of the amateur spank bank industry.

What is a horny exhibitionist left to do? I've heard Flickr is also a possibility but I've never tried it so not sure if they allow videos. Any and all suggestions welcome. :)

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Elaine Benes is the Best Friend You've Ever Had


 Meet Elaine Benes.

 She's the perfect spunky New York gal pal.

 She knows all your secrets...

and will be there in your time of need... with a snack.


Hipsters? Elaine will have none of that.

And she's dealt with internet bullying for years.

Did I mention she loves cake just as much as you do?

and she won't nag you about not going to the gym.

 
Elaine is women with priorities.

 Just don't piss her off or she'll ruin your life!

 Be careful because Elaine is easily excited.

 She literally has moves like Jager

and deep down she's as cynical and bitchy as you are. 





Sunday, October 13, 2013

Joe's Spank Me Time

I'm much more turned on by pictures/thoughts/memories of people I actually know rather then generic porn. (not to say generic porn doesn't work...) This guy is a good example, I used to have a big crush on him back in the day and he's still super sexy. Now he's living happily with his partner in New York and we're still friends via FB and IG. 


*Picture approved for use

Friday, October 11, 2013

Family Ties



If you’re like me, you’ve been on Facebook for a while and the only new friend requests come as a result of a random introduction at a party or change of jobs or cities. You’ve already friended everyone you already ‘really’ know unless they are not on the social network. You’ve looked up former classmates, old neighbors, and friendly ex’s. Let’s face it, if they’re not on your friend’s list yet they probably never will be. Facebook’s “Find People You May Know” feature is purely an excuse to scroll through a list of burley bears for guys you think are cute.

With all that said, earlier this week I actually found someone on Facebook I knew from the past.  I am now friend’s with my cousin Annie. Annie is a first cousin on my father’s side. Her mother is my father’s sister. My family has always been small and all of the family I grew up with is from my mother’s side. My father’s only sister moved to California when I was an infant and as a result we’ve never been very close. In the past 20 years I’ve seen my Aunt only a handful of times. As far as her children go (my cousins) I have no relationship with them what so ever. If we passed each other on the street I doubt we would recognize each other without context. There’s no bad blood or tension, just simply family members growing apart and living separate lives. I guess my father’s casual attitude toward his only sister rubbed off on us. They speak less than once a month but they both seem to be fine with that arrangement.

This all started Tuesday night as I was lying in bed. I realized that god forbid something happen to my parents, I would have no way to contact anyone from that side of the family. I didn’t know an address or phone number. The last time I was at their California estate was in 1997. It occurred to me that Facebook is the perfect tool for this situation and I should look them up. Well that was easier said than done. I was doing this all from my phone so my search options were limited. Knowing very little information about their current lives was only compounded by the fact that their last name is somewhat generic. Hundreds of hits would come back with every search. I decided to focus my search on Annie because she had gotten married and her married name was a bit more unique. Of course that was after a half hour of trying to remember her married name. My hope was she would have her last name hyphenated on FB as most married women do now so they can be found by childhood friends. Once I remembered the married name I searched for it alone and with luck there was only match… a name named Tom. Tom lived in her general area of California so I hoped this might be her husband. As you already know, if you’re not friends with someone you can only see very very limited information about them. He didn’t even have a relationship status. Son of a bitch! I enlarged his profile picture and thankfully Annie had commented on it. Bingo!

So now I have a link to family I’ve never really known. I don’t expect to become BFF’s but at least now we have a way of staying in contact. We can start to build a relationship through likes and status updates.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Theme Party: The 90's

Theme parties are always fun and with Halloween around the corner you might find yourself planning one. I am here to help you make your party a huge success. Your party's success is less about what you do and more about what you don't do. Don't pick the wrong theme and the worst theme out there is an 1980's party. An 80's theme party has been done more times than Jenna Jamison and like the her it needs to be retired and forgotten about.



Instead, set your watch ahead 10 years and throw a 90's party! Those 10 years provide a plethora of style and options to choose from. Here is everything you'll need for your epic 90's bash.

Music:

90's R&B                                Grunge
Brandy                                      Pearl Jam
SWV                                        Sound Garden
Boys II Men                              Blind Melon
En Vogue                                  Nirvana
KC and JoJo                            Green Day
Montell Jordan                          The Cranberries
Tony Toni Tone                         Stone Temple Pilots   
(Early) Mariah Carey                Alice in Chains
Bell Biv Devoe                          Hole
Arrested Development              Fiona Apple



Style

Grunge- Grunge style has its roots in Punk and it easy to master. Girls: look for plaid shirts, army boots, over sized sweaters, baby doll dresses, chokers and dark lipstick. Remember this was long before bronzer and spray tans so pale skin and dark hair complete the look. Guys: Shearling jackets, baggy painter jeans, cargo pants, plaid flannel shirts, Doc Martin's, and ratty/warn cardigans. Everything is oversized and slouchy. Grunge Style Icons: Kennedy (MTV VJ), Kurt Cobain, Courtney Love, the cast of entire Reality Bites, and the little girl bumble bee from the Blind Melon video.



Early Hip Hop- This was the decade where saggy pants began and backward clothes were immortalized by Kris Kross. Large basketball jerseys over white t-shirts, bright colored denim, tight velveteen shirts, cliche African tribal prints and multi-color leather jackets are all staples. Gold jewelry with your name on it was also huge, both in popularity and actual size. Hip Hop Style Icons: DJ Jazzie Jeff and the Fresh Prince, TLC, Coolio, 2Pac, and In Living Color.


Costume Ideas

Couple/Group
The cast of Friends
Nancy Karrigan and Tonya Harding
Titanic Movie cast
TLC w/ condom eyeglasses 
Night at the Roxbury guys
Bill and Ted
Jay and Silent Bob
The Mighty Ducks
Thelma and Louise
The cast of Rent.


Singles
Blossom                          Keri Strug
Monica Lewinsky            Smelly Cat (from Phoebe's song)
Amy Fisher                      the Uni-bomber
OJ Simpson                    Drugged out Courtney Love
Kerri Strug                      Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Edward Scissor Hands   Fran Drescher aka the Nanny


Extra details to add that 90's flavor: Serve Zima shot specials, Give away free slap bracelets, Decorate with Troll Dolls and accessorize with Swatch Watches.


Friday, October 4, 2013

Stomp the Runway



In case you missed it, this is avant-garde designer Rick Owen's Spring 2014 collection presented in Paris. It's incredibly fun as well as ground breaking. Let me break it down for:

-Owens is a very well known and well respected designer in the fashion community. The clothes you are seeing are very real and in line with many of his other collections. His clothes are never ones you'd expect to see for sale at Kolhs.
-He wanted to pay homage to the long history of step teams and as well as using it as an opportunity to design clothes for women with realistic bodies and shapes.
-These women have thighs! To see a anyone other then a stick skinny model on a Paris runway is huge.
-Bravo Rick Owens. You just won my respect.