Sunday, February 13, 2011

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is the day for lovers and couples. I don't have  much experience in this department so I wanted to share the experiences of my friends and how they met their long time partners. Using Facebook I did a little research. I asked how they met and how they have stayed together. Here is what I found:

One thing that surprised me was that the internet played less of a role then I expected. Of course there were couples that met online but they were not the majority. The stories I found were diverse. Some had friends set them up, others met for a one time hook up that blossomed into more. As I dug a little deeper though I realized that time was a major factor when considering how they met. Here is some background information to put everything in perspective: I live in Connecticut and most of my friends are in the southern New England area. Connecticut is not a state for young people. The majority of my friends are  couples that have been together for several years and have come here to settle down.  (most of friends have been together 5-10 years on average) Ten years ago the internet was just starting out as a social meeting place. Friends, bars, and hobbies still played a major role in coupling. God forbid you actually had to leave the house and talk to someone face to face. Of all the stories I got,  several of them involve being on a date with another person. I heard a lot of "When we met I was actually there with someone else." Which makes me wonder about the other person...what ever happened to them? One man's bad date is another man's true love.
Here’s what I’ve learned. There is not one proven way to meet a partner. It can happen in a variety of ways as long as you are open to it. For the tiny minority of single guys I know...keep the faith alive. You never know what’s around the corner.

When I asked those friends how they’ve stayed together I got a much more unified response. The most common answer was that both individuals shared a common set of values and goals. It’s also worth mentioning that 99% of the couples that answered are in open relationships. (99% of the couples I know are open) I’m not passing judgment on monogamy but the statistics are not on it's side.  





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